Closure for Lost Battles

Music Pick of the Day: Third Eye - Big K.R.I.T.

Quote of the Day: "God can do more with who you are than who you pretend to be..."

- Guvna B 

This post is dedicated to : Katie Neamo & Kayshon Hawkins 

CLOSURE TO LOST BATTLES

Happy Holidays! This season brings some people the most comforting and joyous moments they will ever experience and haunt others with times of grieving,mourning, depression and magnifies what they have sacrificed or lost throughout the year. If you fall in either one of these categories, I double dare you to give God thanks anyhow..simply because if you can still "feel", you are still "alive". 

As always, I want to thank you all for your views, comments and reads. The constant support is what keeps me going. This is all preparation and rough draft for my book, Lessons Learned, that I plan to publish in May 2015.  Please stay tuned and keep me motivated, if you will!

So! As we are bringing this year to close, for some the years usually mesh together and there is never a renewing experience. I pray that this year's transition is totally different for you. 2014 shall be the closure to your lost battles. In any situation of loss,failure, or death, ... there is an urge to bring a "relief" or closure to what has transpired. Without closure of some sort, it seems almost impossible to get passed what has happened without that clarity and burden lifted. 

Hopefully this post will help with refocusing your emotions and reach the level of clarity you deserve from my own experiences. Keep in mind, it is an on-going process and lessons are learned daily which modify and alter how to deal with things but I just hope we can inspire each other to move forward so that the Lord can move you upward..how he desires. To God be the glory, I have never had to overcome the extreme loss of a loved one  (to the passing of life) so I cannot speak fluently on that topic. Hopefully, a reader who has experienced/overcome death of a loved one can offer that expertise (feel free to comment or email me - jalynnajones@gmail.com if you have feedback on that topic specifically that you feel can be therapeutic to someone experiencing a similar heartache.)

LOST OF A LOVER

Heartbreak is a normal emotion. It feels lonely, it feels extreme...and you think no one could ever understand how you feel. But just about everyone experiences heartbreak. We react to this in different ways. To this date, it is a process I do not wish on my worst enemy. I challenge you to believe that heartbreak is actually a very strong motivator and one of the greatest opportunities of realism.

Heartbreak usually results from relationship imbalance, misunderstanding and over-loving. Heartbreak is the limitation our body puts on itself to say "Enough is enough, stop what YOU are doing.", key word, YOU. YOU cannot control what someone else will [or will] not do, or and cannot see. Therefore, your clarity will not come from that companion or lover...so limit your tears, your urgency to speak to them; begging, pleading, and arguing...that pushes that person farther away from understanding and farther away from you.

So, I urge you to seek closure in this manner:

Remember why you feel in love with this person to begin with; allow what inspired you to love that person to remind you why you've stayed, endured, and supported them. Allow those reasons to allow you to "forgive" them for what they have done. 

(However, do not allow these reasons to make you feel imprisoned by them, it's okay to let someone go, without remorse, and with a grudge-free spirit toward them) 

Ask God for strength, and ask Him to reveal the "errors" you have made so that you correct them with His help 

Refrain from listening to music that pulls your heart strings...Fill your music selections with motivating and uplifting music 

Refrain from confiding in others about your personal issues with this person. A relationship is between two people. No matter what the circumstance, allow that person to have their dignity and keep your business exclusive. 

Find the root of the problem (where did it start? when did you initially start feeling like this? Did you speak on it with your lover? Did you all come to an understanding? What was the result? What is YOUR Role in this?)

LOST OF A FRIEND 

This one is fairly simple. You may not understand what this person did to you and why but one thing is for sure:  you do not lose friends. Some people are truly associates or seasonal individuals that find you convenient or profitable to their lifestyle. They are users, they have not discovered themselves or their purpose and they chose to leach off of yours; but these people never prosper until they realize the damage they have caused to others. Thus, your closure should be to not victimize yourself  but understand that this person did you a HUGE favor by leaving your life. Now, you can focus on the people who truly do love and appreciate you without that one heavy spirit. 

LOST OF YOURSELF 

Above all, this is the greatest lost anyone can experience. Speaking for myself, at 22, it's traumatizing to lose yourself in the midst of stages where you are truly FINDING who you are; but the great news is that as long as you are live..God is giving you the opportunity to give yourself what you deserve. We are all made for specific purposes to glorify the body of Christ and everything happens for a reason (even though we all know this, we have to constantly be reminded). In life, things transpire that you NEVER imagined would be a part of your existence. But the biggest tool to use in this time of self re-building is FAITH. Specific faith. Faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ. You must have faith that what has been taken from you was not meant for you to keep and what is coming for you cannot be received unless you are looking UP and straight FORWARD. 

You must refrain from:

- Self Pity (looking down - which requires your blessings to go unnoticed - distorts your focus) 

- Debbie Downers (these are people that co-sign on your loss and find this an opportunistic time to also wear you down with how they too, have lost themselves. While, this sometimes is an opportunity for two people to find strength in each other....it often results in a negative force on YOUR re-building process)

THIS is the time to start a new life cycle and pour yourself into the Lord. Not just for the moment, but create a new way of living for yourself that you can commit to!!! Loosing yourself (especially at a young age) is NOT a bad thing. It is verifying your humanness. When everything falls apart, Jesus will be there to pick up the pieces. It may be three hours, three days, three years or thirty --- but that just depends on who he is dealing with and how they decide to cooperate ;). 

In conclusion, the main point to grasp about closure is that the clarity you are seeking is usually within yourself. While it may be difficult not to have a moment with that person you felt like is the reason why you are in this situation... that "closure talk" puts so many people back in the power of the person who is hurting them. It's not about "Falling back" or "cutting someone off";It's more about choosing peace and yourself over the captivity of others. 

I can only speak on this matter from experience and I hope this assists at least one soul "move on", It is surely a part of life. It is rough. But...you can possibly kill yourself emotionally if you do not know how to conquer battles from within. 

Start your "closure" process, today.

- Love, Jalynn A. Jones  

The Dark Side of Greatness : BLACK-ness

Music Choice of the Day:

Big K.R.I.T.

"Red Eye" 

Quote of the Day: "Fear, Fear. It is the crunch of the unstable mind. " 

The Dark Side of Greatness: BLACK-ness

Inspired by: #ThinkHBCU, The Illustrious Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated's HBCU Awareness Week 

Dedicated to: Tiffanie Williams, Breast Cancer Survivor | @pinkwarrior1221 on Instagram

Ms. Tiffanie Williams is a HBCU Alumna of Fayetteville State University and a fine member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated. She is a Breast Cancer survivor who recently had a re-occurrence in her brain. To God be the glory, she is in recovery stages. However, a great friend of hers, Gwendolyn Joyner Wilson has started a fund so that we raise awareness of the disease, its affects, and to help supplement cost of care for Tiffanie. It would do my heart well to know that FSU Students go rally around our Alumna member by supporting the $20 dollar #TiffaniesChallange. Click here to read more information and to donate! If you are unable to give, God bless you still! Send a prayer up and share the link to spread the word!   >> #TiffaniesChallange <<

Disclaimer:

This blog is not cited or sourced and provides limited facts. It is truly my personal outlook of the significance of Historical Black Colleges and Universities and their significance in the 21st Century. 

Now that I am in my senior year, I see the cycle of lifestyle of the average college student who attends an HBCU and the cultures that have morphed overtime. Its good talk for a cafe discussion, but it's such a vital topic that it needs more publicity than the dinning room table or the lounge area's couch. 

I attend Fayetteville State University, the second oldest institution in the UNC School System, which was founded in 1867 by seven black men with approximately $136.00, just two years after the abolition of slavery,as a Teacher's College. We still have an exceptional Education program but we now serve over 5,000 students of all races, ages classes and creeds with an array of fields to study including our new renowned Center for Defense and Homeland Security. 

Some of the culture characteristics of my HBCU are closeness, family-like atmosphere with staff, faculty and administrators, open-concept campus, Greek Life (The National Pan Hellenic Council), Student leadership roles such as Student Government, Council, Royal Court, Theater, Honor Societies, Athletics/Band and Cheer. Homecoming is our Welcome Back celebration to our accomplished Alumni and we greet incoming Freshmen with mentoring and pride at their entrance to the university. 

Truly, if you attend a HBCU and leave the same person you were when you stepped foot on the campus, you did not partake in the HBCU experience. Attending a historical black college/university is a foundation for limitless growth and real world experience. Contrary to the stereotypical belief that all we do is party and sex, we are students apart of a legacy richer than some American history that is notated in grade school literature. 

I hear comments that question the need for HBCUs in 2014, the curiosity why HBCUs are modernizing themselves and becoming global institutions, I even hear the comments of lack of funding, resources, adequate leadership and even a lack of pride/alumni support. I think when we look at the breach and trends of HBCUs we often fail to make the connections with "Black America's" status. HBCU will only thrive if "Black America" will thrive. If we fall, HBCUs, in turn, will fall. We will loose them, our history, and our identity, we loose 106 monuments of Black History and contributions to education...as well as the products of these institutions.

I do not spend as much time on the pavement, in pivotal roles on campus, at every event, standing for every single cause, or even dinning and socializing with my fellow students with my hectic work schedule. Now is my time to transition into the workforce  and to use to skills I have developed at FSU to contribute to my community and my family. However, I hear the freshmen complain about change,comradery, and bore of campus life. It has been the same talk since I came in 2011. 

However, one thing about my the class 2015,  we put action to our words. We also developed mentors, and we learned our university's history so we could implement the change we wanted on OUR campus. That's the KEY with attending FSU and it is also the key to our success as a people. We often bicker and complain and have those "debates" at kickbacks or at lunch when there is "Action" that must take place. 

To the negative outlook on HBCU expansion and growth: An HBCU can expand and grow, we have to move forward! We are sooooo scared to be different or to move up. There is NO greatness in the want to be complacent. So no, we are not the #1 party school...but we have expanded the Fayetteville State University brand across the United States and even to China. Don't you think our Founder would be in awe at that progression? Or is this about you living the "A Different World" fantasy collegiate life you envisioned? 

SHOULD HBCUs still exist? Are they needed?: Historical Black Colleges and Universities will be vital to higher education as long as the world exist. It should NEVER be a question if they are needed in the realm of education. They may have started off as places to foster learning of rich minds of the suppressed, under-served, and counted-out youth of African decent but in all honesty, they are still serving the same purpose. We are still suppressed, under-served and counted-out... and have the nerve to wonder be concerned with our "cool points" compared to other HBCUs. I want to urge all Broncos and readers of this post to support the forward movement of Historical Black Colleges and Universities. We must see the value in ourselves by supporting what was built for US. 

Instead of referring to ourselves as Kings and Queens are reverberating behaviors of peasants and baboons and mimicking the lifestyles of the perceived "rich and famous", it's about time we start acting like the royal titles we echo. It does not mean you cannot have fun and let free, there are still parts of our young culture that I feel are acceptable for our age, however...there has to be a point drawn and priorities have to be considered. 

And those are just my thoughts. Being of African decent is truly more POWERFUL than we think. We have the richest array of skin tone, talent, knowledge and we have superior intellect that would shift the nation and the world if we put it to use. However, the dark side of our greatness is that we have been sucked into believing celebrity status, social networking vanity, and becoming a "power couple" with a mate is ... an accomplishment.

But that's just my interpretation of the situation. Thank you for your support. I hope to release my book "Lessons Learned" in 2015. 

Have a great month! Don't forget about the "Tiffanie's Challange"!

- With Love 

M4M S4S [Murder 4 Movement, Shot 4 Shoutout]

Song of the Day: His Pain - BJ the Chicago Kid & Kendrick Lamar

"There is no Justice...There is no Peace...nor change...or movement
In being a lukewarm activist...either you is or you ain't"

Good Day Viewers! So much is going on...of value...and this blog-post is NOT just applicable to minorities or to the young and urban...It should be a thought provoking piece for us all...Especially for Americans.  If you  are ready to get on this train of truth...let's take this ride!

PREJUDICE - POLICE BRUTALITY - GANG VIOLENCE - TRAPPING - VIOLENCE - POLLUTION - MEDIA MANIPULATION - PERSONAS - FALSE MANHOOD/WOMANHOOD - IGNORANCE - LACK OF COMMUNITY INVOLVEMENT - MENTAL SLAVERY - PHYSICAL SLAVERY 

I know, it's fairly easy to adopt a different profile picture that's "blacked out" to show support for Trayvon Martin. It's even doable to change your identity to honor the loss of a life...#IAMMIKEBROWN. 

But just like Bringing back "our" Girls, (and ... shoot I have regretfully forgot the names of the other fly-by-night movements.)..all these virtual rallies fizz out within days and people continue to live their lives. This is not a preaching season but more-so another approach for realism. Any rallies,movements,marches by Blacks happened with strategic thought and purpose. There was no such thing as "fizzing out". There was no choice but to seek justice and change through their actions because their movements were their lives. 

When I say strategic, I mean...well thought out...ordered...organized...visible...unity.... 

and the spokesmen were credible based upon image, community influence, and ability to be the face of the movement. 

The CIVIL RIGHTS movement was very intricate in detail. There was a face for every age group and their actions and words were supported by the people...the "Black" people. It was NOT a weekend thing...or a day thing... or a cutesy thing. Rosa Parks was not trying to be cute and get attention when she firmly planted herself in  "forbidden" seating area to Blacks on a public bus. 

The only way we can modernize the movement... and the issues in bold...is through strategy. If it is not a life mission... nothing will ever change. 

It is truly very hard to really HONESTLY, WHOLEHEARTEDLY adopt #IAMMIKEBROWN....because just around this time last year ... I was at a 100 City Vigil for Trayvon Martin... and I was HIM. I cannot adopt these people's identity and neither can you. Most of us...do not truly even know ourselves to confidently introduce ourselves in a room. Subsequently, I will support with prayers and bring awareness to these matters without  adopting extra personalities and virtual movements.. I recognize the lives lost everyday to the streets and to our police. I, myself, have lost FOUR cousins to MURDER.

After much learning in a bible study session today, I began to realize where we are truly going wrong. A lot of people want to bicker with the media and fight racial discrimination not understanding that the natural laws and "ways" of the land are not centered around equality. Subsequently, a friend made a good point yesterday. She said "we always want change..but where are our people when it's time for local elections...or in community service..". We HAVE to stop with action that is extreme, violent, unorganized and REACTIVE

There is LIMITED power of influence over social media when is comes to justice being served... However, when feet are planted and word of mouth travels and mindsets begin to change, justice to yourself...and your kind (whether that be race, generational and creed) BEGIN... a trail of justice that has to continue from generation to generation.



Be prepared to see this behavior continue.

But get off your horse of entitlement and understand change does not come easy nor is it owed.

So, now, I ask. Does some of the blame fall on us for the way society treats us from not picking up the momentum where our ancestors, civil rights, NAACP Activists, and (for my fellow Greeks that are active members of African American founded sororities and fraternities) our Founders left off? A lot of activism, health and political awareness has been pushed to the bottom of the priority list among young people. So.... instead of "damning" the government and county officials, we should definitely take credit for our part in our status as African Americans as well.

Be prepared to see this behavior continue - if we do not ban together in truth with strategy to devise plans at home first then to our neighbor...then the community...our schools...our local government.... and so on and so fourth. 

Feed Me ... Only Fruit

Music Choice of the Day:  "Errbody - Yo Gotti"

Quote of the Day:
"The privileged are not defined by what they do, who they know, or what they have; The privileged are defined by their ability to live fearlessly and without limits or boundaries"

Happy August, Viewers!
It is such a blessing to have another chance to live and make a  mark on the blogging field and to have you all's support! SUMMER TIME! I usually spend my summers getting my "body" right and trying to find things to do with my leisure time but God "showed" me this season that my plans were minute compared to what HE had prepared for me.  It was time to get my inside right - and no workout can fix your spirit and your mental health. In order for me to grow, Jesus truly had to break me down..almost to insanity for me to cling to him to be rebuild holistically.

All in all, I walk into this next season of fruitfulness, understanding the necessity to really sit, and in a therapeutic way, go over the lessons I have learned so that I can truly apply them as I take my next steps into young adulthood.


For your reading pleasure, I have listed the lessons that have had the most impact in my transition into a womanhood of integrity. This season was full of change, and tribulation BUT in turn, it truly heightened my senses as a woman, a friend, a lover, a confidant, a motivator, a student, an educator, a daughter, and so on and so fourth.

Purge Me to Make Me Over 

1) An empty spirit cannot proposer 

2) Loyalty is a figment of our imagination ( - feel me on that, really stick a pin in this one. It's extremely vital)

3) Speak OVER yourself

4) Sacrifice - Temporary Pain for Permanent and Genuine Joy 

5) The Benefit in the Struggle

I will briefly elaborate on two of these lessons... Part 2 of "Feed Me...Only Fruit" will go into depth about the other topics and feedback from viewers. I hope you enjoy :) 

An Empty Spirit Cannot Prosper 

See, we give so much of ourselves daily. Even the most selfish person has to give away some piece of themselves day in and day out. The most generous person...who gives of themselves, their finances, their time, their emotions, et cetera, MUST refill so that they are not a broken vessel attempting to contribute positive energy into the atmosphere. A empty spirit who continuously gives allows their good works to become tasks  instead of a deed coming from the heart - that is charged to the kingdom and the forward movement of the body of Christ. If you have no encouragement, if you have not been in your word and you are surrounded by negative spirits, you are destroying yourself and starving yourself - and your life's mission.
 It is very imperative that good people are linked to you to refill with you and help you by providing advisement, motivation and encouragement. In order to prosper and gain spiritually, one has to remain emotionally intelligent enough to live each day exuding love and kindness while realistically working through life's experiences.

This life WILL surely drain you at times. BUT, that is why we have our Word, and why it is necessary to PRAY, MEDITATE, and Strategically Think through all situations.

Note to self: "Never get so high that you loose yourself and all the growth it took to get you to your current point. No amount of worldly success can compare to fulfillment you will receive from being obedient to your lessons, morals, and guidance from the Holy Spirit."  

Loyalty Is A Figment of Our Imagination 

I truly believe LOYALTY is false man-made sense of "YOU OWE ME".... but after many valuable comments from friends,family and Instagram followers, I must stand corrected.

My View: 

We are not even loyal to ourselves and our own desires... let alone fully loyal to each other. Once we learn that we have become a possessive people, obsessed with claiming people and imprisoning them with OUR emotions... we learn that loyalty is truly just a figment. I searched the bible....could not find the word "loyal" ... I have looked at a standard set of marriage vows...did not find "loyalty or loyal. So that just tells me - I have been focusing on the wrong thing and I had to reprogram myself to truly understand what God wanted to give in my relationship and what I deserved to receive. Loyal...was not one of those standards. We are a  flawed people, the belief that someone owes you "loyalty" is... selfish. Simply because of my previous statement that sometimes we are barely loyal to our own dreams, wants, needs and desires.

My Redefined Perspective

 (after some insight from comments on "loyalty")

I stand corrected after a mini study session with the etymology and break down of some of the Aramaic translations that coincide with the word "loyal".  However, in my findings --- comparing the deep meaning of the Aramaic words and phrases (the language Christ spoke) to the definition of "loyal" in the urban community and in the modern bonds between people, I still have a hard time finding how capable we are of experiencing loyal love or giving loyal love. The only loyal love I have experienced, is to the Love of Jesus Christ. The closest thing to that is .... my mother.

Subsequently, we surely use the term "loyal" just as loosely as we use the term "love". In turn, I do believe true love exist so now that I think about it, "loyal love" does exist; however, it is awfully rare. So rare that it feels like a figment of my imagination. I feel so enriched in my redefined perspectives from you all's comments and from the urge to understand that English translations in the bible sometimes translate loosely. So I learned that the equivalent meaning for "loyal" is steadfast, kind, truth, faithfulness. It appears in the bible in about 245 instances so it is a characteristic that we must strive to possess. So while we may never reach perfection ... of loyalty ... or "steadfastness"... we should constantly seek to be that in our acts of kindness and in our personal relationships, in our  community and with our Lord and Savior.

Thank you for you all's feedback and constant support. Stay tuned for Part 2 of "Feed Me..Only Fruit" - a mini series to my project "Lessons Learned".

Have a great school year! Congratulations to the Class of 2014...but Class of 2015 is coming through ;)

God Bless

Truly Yours,

-Jalynn A. Jones

It's Not Me, It's You

Music Choice of the Day: Stumble - Tinashe 

"Find the pleasure in rejection. Someone is relieving you of their baggage, their insecurities, and of their incapacity to be an enhancement to your life. It's not you, it's them" - Jalynn Jones"

It's Not Me, It's You 

Happy Valentine's Day my humble viewers! As always, I want to give great thanks to you all for giving me inspiration and motivation to dedicate my time to this therapeutic release known as "Galactic Interlude". This is all warm up for my project in progress Lesson Learned. Please stay tuned, leave comments, questions, suggestions and insight for improvement or just to touch on the topic(s) I discuss in each post. All criticism is welcomed. 

WELL, you all, I have been really breaking mental barriers lately. God has given me a mind that never rest. Like many of you all, I sometimes regret how deep and intricate my thought process is; I challenge you today to just thank Jesus Christ for thinking too much instead of not thinking enough. I have been facing the feeling of not belonging for years, probably since the age of 5. I always knew their was something different about me and instead of attempting to conform, I was true to myself all throughout my school days. I often became victim to bullying and verbal abuse from my peers but might I say that being "different" is so popular now lol - I guess it all was worth it. My void of not belonging was also associated by not being accepted holistically by any male. Currently, at the age of 21,  I still cannot say that I have encountered an attraction of full understanding and willingness to understand me.

I lost my virginity at the age of 14. I did not start a horrible trend of promiscuity but I know I gave my body to men who only had skin deep interest in me. I have noticed through my collegiate career that my sexual needs and emotional needs have collided and also my strong need for affection and understanding... I am not perfect but I have been molding myself for my life partner for a while now and I had a heart wrenching encounter with a man last night that allowed me to come to the conclusion that it's not me that's messed up and that is undeserving of the things my heart desires. I know that I am simple with wants and complex in person. I have quite a demanding nature but I wholeheartedly love all the people I make connections with and I strongly believe that doing whatever is required to make my loved ones feel as such is never a second thought... it's priority to me. Thus, leading me to the understanding that I am not the issue in my quest to love and understanding. It is more the people that I choose. A broken soul cannot heal a broken soul. Two broken pieces still don't make a whole item because in the struggle of brokenness, pieces get lost along the way; If one has not taken the necessary steps to refill and grow and become whole again with the help of the Lord, they go through their life cutting people, sometimes without even noticing. 

Many of the men that are in my bracket are not done with understanding their long term goals and successes which leads me to believe that mature young women in our generation are linking themselves with men who are not equally yoked with their knowledge and assurance of success. I am firm in my belief that if a man is lacking drive, ambition and want to understand a woman in every aspect, he is not ready for any other relationship other than a friendship with no sex involved. I have made the mistake of linking myself with people who are not on my pathway. Just because people have the same fundamental values with you, it is does mean they believe the way you believe or understand they way you understand. The pact I have made to myself is to continue growing and learning myself. I am far too intelligent to continue into a cycle of uncertainty into my twenty's. My biggest fear is not being able to find "the one". It seems so unattainable sometimes to the point it overwhelms me. But God will provide. I am confident that in due time, understanding and companionship will greet me. 

I am sure you all are wondering, what kind of encounter did I have to make me think about this? Well, I hate being ignored. It is demeaning. It makes me feel like less than a person. And a loved one of mine knows this is one of my most aggravating pet peeves but finds it hard to UNDERSTAND why it is so demeaning to me. He ignored to the point to where I felt insane. I broke down, Literally. I did not even know I was capable of screaming as loud as I did. I came to the realization that I do not love anyone enough to allow them to drive me crazy. I have done everything in my being to make this person feel accepted, loved and supported.  I want to tell you all, there is no confirmation or explanation you have to give to anyone when you have reached your breaking point. Your explanation usually ends up putting you back in that person's possession. Declare when you have had enough within yourself. That's the hardest part. It is painful but we have to come to a point where are more important which includes our feelings and what we deserve. I am for certain, the King that I belong to WILL accept me. I let all the worry go today in Jesus' Name.

 It's not Me, It's You. 

What's It Gonna Cost Me?

Music Choice of the Day: Sacrifices, Fabolous

What's It Gonna Cost Me?

Wow! It has been a long time but I definitely want to thank you all for your views and readings. Hopefully, my words are timeless to you...meaning they can be read at any time and still have validity. 

A few updates before I jump into it! Well, A project entitled Lessons Learned will be published by 2015 so please be looking for that soon! It is a great goal of mine to allow my story and lessons to be a blessing or a word for someone to take in and learn from. I am a transparent person not for purposes to be judged but to be a living example to young women who yearn to be successful and for young men to understand the complications of being a young black woman with sass and zeal and where it all comes from! I also encourage you to take your pain and turn it into a testimony as well!! That is a true difference between a believer and a non believer; what one does in correspondence to pain truly shows what type of person one is.

And last but not least, I have many more thank you's I would regret not mentioning. Dr. Jade B. Gillespie, and  of course to my beautiful mother, Ruth Moore. Also, to my Bronco Family.  I do everything in your honor. 

My soul wants to tell you all so much. So bare with me for I have no order, I will just come straight from my finger tips: ....

 "What Will It Cost You\\Me?" ... derived from a chapter in Lessons Learned  called "It's Cost Me A Lot", a title inspired from J. Cole Friday Night Lights mixtape release. I have seen my most trying days in my current state. 2013 was a year of my greatest losses and most honorable wins. Ironically, a great loss can outweigh any win recognized by man. So, I live and cease to loose my main focus in all that I am involved in...because I have a whole family depending on my success, a weight I put on myself not by choice but by God's. So I take on the heavy weight, I take on the ridicule and I just continue to press forward. Now do not get me wrong. I have not taken action toward adversity the right way now. I actually have acted out horribly this year but hey!!! It's life. "Lessons Learned"! Growth is recognizing your fault, asking for forgiveness and moving forward in grace..God's grace because man has no grace. You're their topic until someone else is the fool of the week. 

All in all, I want to believe that the year two thousand and thirteen made me someone I never imagined I would be but in all actuality, I made myself with my decisions, my relationships and associations. Women have the gift and vice of being able to create a facade of being goal oriented when we actually are .... but we have underlining goals that are much more important like true love and mental stability. I am not a victim to that mindset but a victor. Success to me is not green like money, or pink and red on Valentine's Day but colorless. I realized this year, that I will be successful by all means in the realm of love and family. It warms my heart to envision my future family and journey to love and I will continue to build upon a foundation of stability to get to that point. I do not know how long it will take, but I know it will cost me. It will cost me friends, it'll charge my patience and I know for sure that it will COST ME A LOT...but I will spend my 2014 investigating how it will [really] cost me.....

Until Next Time!!! 

||| HiiPower |||

What is HiiPower?

" HiiPower is the way we think,the way we live. See it's known today that the human race is nothing - No morals, No standards. What we are about to do is raise the level of expectations. No, you don't have to have a lot of money, you don't have to be rich but you will be rich in mind and spirit. "

- Kendrick Lamar; Cut You Off (To Get Closer); O.verly D.edicated

Our generation uplifts creativity. History proves that everything that's done today has been done before but we take pride in our gift of sampling legends to create diverse ideas. While I admire the beauty in our addiction to creative ideas, I want to stress our lack of education to what we "like". One of the most influential branches of media is Music. We listen to the sounds that evoke emotion and movement and settle for the lyrics and beat without going beyond what is heard to know what our souls are being fed.

While Hip Hop has been adopted as an urban religion, it is rumored that a lot of demonic influences are intertwined in what we listen to every day. If your anything like me, you question the controversy about music and it's subliminal messages. However, I do urge you to watch what you listen to, because anything you are exposed to can influence your thoughts and your actions.

Instead of resorting to social networks and songs to tell you what you believe in, discover things for YOURSELF. We live in a time where technology makes it easy to make anything sound plausible. Investigate E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. Be inspired by those who choose to take a path that strays away from the "norm". Let the creativity we admire help you reach your goals instead of living vicariously through other people's inventions. Feel me? Yes? No? Bottom line, the world is too big to live dormant. Step out of YOUR box and learn. Learn to live.

..Food for thought. :)

Of course, my artist of choice for this entry is Kendrick Lamar. He is an artist from Compton, California who charms and educated with his wisdom and inquiry for the controversial issues of today's time. He is apart of a group called "Black Hippy". It is beautiful to see the game take a this turn back to educated black man using a gift of rhyme to reach others. His music is truly inspiring, relatable and refreshing. Be on the look out for his album "A Good Kid in a Mad City" in 2012.

Ab Soul Outro ft. Ab-Soul

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtUsEbbVBuo